A farmer's market?

That's right party people. There was a farmer's market right outside of my work today! So great! Not only was the weather perfect, but there was legitimately a farmer's market selling plants and fruit and cheese and lots of pies and apple turnovers right outside.

Now, yesterday, the city literally knocked the crap out of me.

I ran late for my train (surprise, surprise) and I actually had to bang on the train doors for them to open to let me on. I'm actually still not sure how I got on that train?! So, after coming home, I was a little burnt out.

But, the tables were turned today, when there was a farmer's market outside. It made the city seem all the less stressful and crazy, and made everything just seem really awesome and great. And, while I still don't like sprinting through the Big Apple, I sure do like all the things I get to see when I take the time to look around and take in everything around me.

Sidenotes: I'm excited for a legendary weekend. The farmer's market made me excited to head back to school and to make a conscious effort to go to Charlottesville's farmer's market. I have lost all of my badminton playing abilities, which is really sad. I have not lost my volleyball playing abilities, which makes up for some of the sadness that are my current badminton skills.

Rockstar of the Day is Coach Brown's 3-year-old son, Tyler, who I got to play with tonight at open gym. P&B!

Stay classy NY?

In the spirit of keeping it classy, I would like to make a public service announcement to all those riding the Long Island Railroad: Please stop cutting your nails on the train. Nothing about it is ok.

Rockstar of the Day is the girl who sat next to me on the train home who watched Anchorman with me. She was so nice and friendly. Monday = Donzamillion! P&B.

Could the weekend possibly be over?

This weekend was the NYA- New York Adventure. It involved some wonderful friends, family, and lots of fun.

Highlights include getting pizza at Mannino's, performing minor surgery on some cupcakes, seeing Inception, or wait, was that a dream...oh gosh, who knows (see what I did there?), lots of girl talk, also some manly bonding, Tata and Ichi, eel, a sassy sleepover, Team North, Team South, team driving, a few guidos, crazy big waves, extra wittiness, extra bedextra pb&j's, power naps, slurpees, grillin' steaks, pool time, tub time, a short sing-a-long, trivia, way too many chocolate chip cookies, aloe, bagels, port jeff, no puppies, and sweaty hugs.

But, the best thing about this weekend was all the laughing. I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard for so many days in a row! Some would say that being super over-tired makes everything seem extra funny, but I honestly think I would have laughed just as hard even if I had slept a full 12 hours each night.

Rockstars of the Weekend were my lovely, hysterical, wonderful visitors for being such stellar friends and for ALWAYS making me laugh so hard it's impossible to hold it back. Hope everyone's weekend was grand. P&B.

New favorite quote: "Don't yell at me." Thanks B-ski.

Can it possibly be Friday?

Answer: The National Dog Show. Go figure!

I have three important updates today.

1. I know I don't have a twitter account, but if you're in the market, I really feel like this

video might help you decide if you want one or not. Actually, regardless of how you feel about Twitter, you will like this video.

2. Yesterday I experience the most heinous breach of train etiquette. There was a girl give or take my age who talked on the phone to her boyfriend for about 30 straight minutes. Actually, let me rephrase that: There was a girl give or take my age who literally shouted on the phone to her boyfriend for about 30 straight minutes. And, not only was she talking about things that were very irrelevant, she said "like" after every other word. It was rough. I kept looking around to see who else was being affected by this rude action, but I guess some people are just better at tuning people out than me.

The only positive thing to come out of this encounter is that I will now be consciously trying to decrease my use of the word like in everyday life.

3. I'm VERY excited for a Zenith filled weekend. This week, while it was pretty great, knocked my socks off, so I can't wait to go to the beach and laugh for 3 days straight.

Rockstars of the Day are my family for opening up my home and welcoming my friends. P&B

Is it Friday yet?

What are the two most profitable hours of television that NBC airs each year? First person to answer correctly is Thursday's Rockstar!

In other news, I'd very much like it to be Friday now. Boom baby.

Rockstar of the Day is the security guard who works at my building. I don't know how he just stands there and monitors the elevators all day, but he does. And he's always quite pleasant. P&B.

Is this real life?

Today was the most wonderful of days! I should have known from the start that today would be exciting as soon as the lights starting going on and off on the train. The GC was back from vacation, which was a good sign, but the train was going unusually slow.

One of the key players in today's randomly awesome greatness was this kid me and Stephanie have encountered multiple times on the Subway. He is most definitely another intern, and is always dressed to impress in his business casual, but he also wears orange adidas sneakers. I used to (and still do) love those shoes.

I had a pair with red reflective stripes back in the day (not tacky) and honestly still wished I owned them. Regardless, this kids shoes have become an exciting part of the morning commute. Also, he's got one of those L.L. Bean backpacks, with the initials, and they're TJ...nice.

Anyways, it was a great day, and apart from my computer actually going so slow it was almost impressive, I successfully made myself and Stephanie a little later for the train than intended. I can't help it...I live on the edge. We caught the train with 4 minutes to spare! And, in NY time, that means we literally could have had a 5-course meal we had so much time to kill! Then, on the way home, as we were having a normal, intellectual conversation about Final Cut Pro, I totally lost my train of thought. I had no idea what I was talking about!

Now, for those of you who know me, you might think this is because of my lack of multi-tasking ability. And, if you thought that, you'd probably be partially right. BUT, the real reason I couldn't concentrate was because all of the sudden some very rude man on the train thought it was a good time to clip his fingernails. I wish I was kidding, but I'm not. Good Long Island Railroad etiquette.

When I got home, ready to tell everyone all about my day, there was a pleasant surprise: Not only was my dog, Riley there, but my Dad's friend Jeff's dog was there too, her name obviously also being Riley. So, the two Riley's ran around my kitchen. The visiting Riley was a shitzu and looked like a Gremlin. My Riley, who is very used to being the center of attention, was giving everyone the cold shoulder because she was jealous of the Little Riley. The whole thing was pretty comical. Then Jeff came over and dinner went on for at least another hour, followed by strawberry rhubarb pie. Since I love having long dinners, this was the perfect wrap up to such a funny day.

In writing this day out, I'm not sure if you think it's funny at all. But, to me, it was almost sitcom worthy. And, the main point, if you take anything away from reading this post, is that days like this are just the best. It's great to have a great day. But, to tell you the truth, nothing truly great happened today. It was really just a bunch of random, funny, little things that culminated in an eventful Monday. And, to tell you the truth, I think these are the days that I like best. There are many potential Rockstars of the Day today, but it's going to have to go to Willie Geist today. P&B everyone. Happy almost Tuesday.

Did you miss me?

Hello everyone! Sorry I've been slacking on the blog recently! It's been a busy couple of days. Busy...but good. Good...but busy. Either way, I've been debating on what to write about, because there's been a bunch of blog-worthy things that I feel need to be discussed, but instead of write on and on forever, I figured I'd just make a short list-like post about some high-lights from the past few days.

Twilight- Upon announcing my allegiance to Team Jacob via FB, there was a flood of comments. Not going to lie, however lame this might be, since I'm not usually a big status updater, it was pretty fun to see how agreed with me, and who was not very happy with my decision to side with the wolves.

The ESPY's- As I've mentioned previously, I really like awards shows and have intense appreciation for professional athletes, so this was a cool show. In addition to the awards, they had a lot of vignettes about different people across the country, both famous and not famous, but they all focused on the importance of character. Character, obviously an important trait, was not something I ever thought too much about. Sometimes it's not until you hear an amazing story about a high school coach out in the mid-west who literally changed his players' lives for the better, do you realize the importance of character.

Also, it was hosted by the wonderful Seth Meyers. He's awesome.

NYC- Continues to impress. And, while being a working girl makes me really tired some days, it has its perks. Not only was I exposed to some fantastic people, who make that "dream job" seem somewhat more attainable (and showed me a clip of Brian Williams slow-jamming the news with Jimmy Fallon...watch it!) AND I get to do cool tasks like order 25 frostees and 25 medium fries at the local Wendy's to have a surprise party. Solid day.

Being a hostess- So, there were famous people from this crazy show at the restaurant last night! I had no idea who they were for about an hour, and still didn't know til I got home and Googled them, but how cool is that?! They were a little crazy, but just your average, everyday, reality show television stars living normal lives and eating delicious sushi!

Toy Story 3- Bring the Kleenex.

Dreams- Last night I most definitely had a dream that I met Andy Samberg and that he was impressed by my "don't make me sing" skit impersonation. This is probably because I watched this skit, and also this one, right before I fell asleep. It was excellent.

Hope you enjoyed that increasingly random list of thoughts from my last few days! The heat wave is still going strong here, but hey, it's the holidays. Rockstar of the Weekend is my Grandma who is visiting from Florida for the week! P&B...and stay classy.

HOOS Spreading the Love?

The answer to that question would be everybody. Today I literally received multiple Spread the Love related e-mails from various people. It was awesome. A special thanks to everyone who talked about Spread the Love today, sent me an e-mail about Spread the Love today, anyone who texted me about Spread the Love today, and even if you thought about it, and didn't tell me, good for you. I hope it put a smile on your face and made your day great.

In other news, Stephanie and I finally figured out how to leave the Subway station correctly today. It has taken well over a month, but today was quite the accomplishment. There are multiple exits from this particular Subway station, and every day, we end up leaving out of a different one- it's that confusing! But today, after much debate, we found the perfect exit, and will never be lost again. Go Team.

Finally, sorry I'm not sorry I'm on Team Jacob. DISCLAIMER: I still really like Edward. I really do. I guess this kind of makes me a renegade Twilight fan. I don't think it's kosher to like both of them, but one of them a little bit more. Either way, Team Jacob for the win.

P&B. Today was quite the day! Rockstars of the Day are the STL'ers, Erica, and Ed.

Team Edward or Team Jacob?

Team Jacob. Team Jacob. Team Jacob.

P&B. If you can't guess Rockstar of the Day, I'm worried about you.

So, how does this 3-way calling work?

Happy almost Monday! Hope you all had a wonderful weekend. I personally had a great weekend. My uncle, aunt, and cousin are still here visiting, and it has been so great to have them here. It has been really fun to have a little kid running around the house (Kai is about 2.5 years old!) and he may be the cutest little kid I have ever seen in my life- maybe tied with Audrey (Honorary Zenith).

Today was a wonderful pool day, which was quite relaxing. Believe it or not, I had not been in the pool yet all summer, so it was about time. Me, my sister, Jenna, Tata, and my uncles also had a great volleyball game and celebrated 7/11 Free Slurpee Day! We also watched the World Cup Finals, and watched Spain beat the Netherlands. We really thought that the game would go to penalty kicks, but in the last 4ish minutes, Spain scored, and that was it. Congrats Spain! I'm not really sure who I was rooting for, but it was an exciting game nonetheless. I love watching big games like that, and I'm very excited I got to see the finals, but it still stinks to see someone lose.

And, lastly, I had a GREAT Conference Call with some of my fellow Spread the Lovers on Friday. For those of you who don't know about Spread the Love, I promise you'll get the full story of its wonderful-ness one of these days, but let's just say it's one of my favorite things, probably ever, to talk about, so any day that involves an STL discussion = a great day. I won't go into a ton of details about the CC, but let's just say STL is going to be back and better than ever for 2010!

Rockstars of the Weekends = my whole family, my wonderful friends, and STL!

Can you feel the Heat?

Hello everyone! The big news tonight is obviously LeBron James and his hour-long special announcing where he would be playing for the next five years. Unfortunately, he did not sign with the NY Knicks, but decided to go with the Miami Heat. Since this decision became such a national phenomenon, I thought it was great how James donated all of the money from the ESPN special to the Boys and Girls Club. Although I would have liked to see LeBron play for New York, I was thoroughly impressed with The King and how he announced his decision.

Also exciting, today the Emmy nominations for the 62^nd Emmy Awards (to take place August 29) were released. Here are two exciting categories. More to come in future posts about the rest of the categories for sure.

Outstanding Drama Series:

- Breaking Bad (AMC)

- Dexter (Showtime)

- Mad Men (AMC)

- Lost (ABC)

- The Good Wife (CBS)

- True Blood (HBO)

Outstanding Comedy Series:

- 30 Rock (NBC)

- Curb Your Enthusiasm (HBO)

- Glee (FOX)

- Modern Family (ABC)

- Nurse Jackie (Showtime)

- The Office (NBC)

Today was an unusually busy day at work- lots of projects to do and lots of learning, so that was really great. And, in the middle of all that, I had an epic group g-chat…what could be better?

I’m also big Thursday fan, so that made my day even better. Thursdays are definitely my favorite day of the week. I like Thursdays because on Thursdays, it’s legitimately almost Friday, which is always reason to be happy. On Wednesday, even when you can say, oh wow, we’re halfway done with the week, this doesn’t really matter that much. In saying you’re halfway done with the week, this still obviously means you’ve got a whole lot more of the week to get through. But, on Thursday, you can definitely get pumped up because now it’s more than halfway through the week- you made it! Now you only have to power through Friday, and you’re good to go.

Tonight was the next installment of Burgers Across Long Island. Lauren, Rob, and I went to Five Guys Burgers. I had never been there before, but I thought it was good. I think I might like Roadside better, due to the fact that the Five Guys Burgers were huge and I’m a huge fan of Roadside’s sweet potato fries, but it was overall a positive experience.

And, finally, I am very excited about tomorrow because my aunt and uncle are coming to visit with their son, my cousin Kai. This is ridiculously exciting because I have not had the pleasure of seeing Kai since I graduated high school (don’t hate ’08)! Back then, he was just an infant, but now he’s 2.5 years old, so I can’t wait to hang out with them all weekend. I feel like me and Kai have a special family connection because his birthday is really close to mine, in March, and he was born the year I graduated from high school. And, what’s cool is that I was born the year my uncle, his father, graduated from high school! Nice.

Rockstar of the day was the weather today because it was not over 100 degrees. Well done Mother Nature. P&B.

Wait...where'd we park?

Today is the day of destiny. The man. They myth. The Legend…was back. Back and better than ever. The GC has returned to us on this beautiful day of mild weather (literally 100 degrees).

We thought it would never happen…we thought wrong.

He didn’t even ask for our July train passes…because he’s psychic, he knew we had them. He’s the GC, and he was greatly missed, but now he is found. All is right in the world.

In other news, I had quite the Legendary adventure this past weekend. On Saturday morning, around 7:30 am, Lance and I embarked on quite the road trip. Equipped with 7 CD’s and a GPS on a time delay (rude), we trekked down to our nation’s capital. Also, fun fact: there were legitimately only 3 songs that we played in the car that I didn’t like at all. I don’t remember the other 2, but the one that I really didn’t enjoy was Landslide by the Dixie Chicks. Too sappy for me.

K, so, we got to Georgetown, and my dear friend Katie picked me up, and we spent the afternoon window shopping and talking a lot. We split a delicious pizza for dinner, and I drank about 8 cups of water, because it was really hot out. Then we went to Georgetown Cupcake and got delicious cupcakes! The line was out the door, but it was well worth it. While we ate the cupcakes, we sat on the stoop of a random house and pretended we lived there…not awkward. We also walked around a read random menus of fancy restaurants and continued to take pictures of ourselves in front of houses that we did not own…oops. We also simulated the Amazing Race while we looked for Katie’s perfectly parallel parked car (we won in case you were wondering). When then got back to Katie’s house and watched SNL, hosted by Drew Barrymore. The Italian Gilly and the University of Aasldjfslk were really funny.

Sunday, we went to Dulles to pick Chuck up from his 6-week Peruvian adventura. We then rode to the super clean Metro, while listening to this boss-like song, and went to DC. We went to the American History Museum and then found a very sassy Mexican restaurant that makes the guacamole right in front of you! It was very spicy, but also quite tasty. We all got tacos and then we got gelato. But wait, there’s more. After that, we saw the fireworks, which were so b-e-a-utiful because they were right behind the Washington Monument, so it was a very cool view. And, if you think this actually couldn’t get any better, Panda the Manda showed up, and we walked around the city for another 2 hours chatting with him. We then rode the most crowded subway in the history of the world, and there was a baby that screamed the whole time, which was unfortunate. When we got home, we had Vienna Late Night, complete with cookies and lots of talking (two of my favorite things)!

Monday, I went to Qdoba before noon for the first time in my life. Then, Lance and I hit 0.00 traffic on the way home! This trip reaffirmed the fact that I am not a very good co-pilot because I get very easily distracted, and sometimes forget to read the directions out-loud until the very last minute, but we got home in about 7 hours- a great success.

Concluding, this was an excellent trip! I thought DC was a wonderful city, and I really enjoyed

getting to catch up with so many of my friends in such a short period of time. Even though my legs got super tired when we were walking, the views of all the monuments in DC are pretty epic- especially the Jefferson Memorial (he’s a major boss). It’s cool to hear about everyone’s summer adventures, because a lot of them are so different than mine. This summer I’ve really appreciated weekend adventures, so I suggest everyone tries some of their own.

Rockstar of the Day/Weekend are all of my friends who I got to see, and to East Coast Traffic, for not being bad at all this weekend. Honorable mention goes to the guys in Mantage, because it provided so many great one-liners this weekend! I’m out…but I’ll be back! P&B.

You've Got Mail?

Way back in the day, when this blog consisted of a mere two posts, I wrote about one of my favorite things: dance parties. At the end of that post (in addition to adding a really nice picture of chips and guacamole), I promised I would have write more posts about things that I really liked. Well, I know you've all be anxiously awaiting for another post like this, so here it is- and it's all about e-mail.

E-mail, and let's face it, more importantly G-mail, at this point in my life, is the best. Literally the best. I want to be clear that I am not writing about e-mail just because I now have it on my phone. In fact, I am still getting used to this- it takes away the excitement of opening up my computer and seeing what new e-mails I got for the day! But, I'm over it...moving on: E-mail is the best because not only does it make you feel like you're chatting with someone you don't get to see very often, but it lets you make witty one-liners with your friends all day long! After I passed the cat e-mail (refer to previous post) along to some friends, it hit me how cool e-mail really was. Emily told me her whole office enjoyed it, and Marisa said she was actually laughing out loud. A girl I sent it to in my office actually teared up from laughter. Now, I am not saying you need to think every e-mail is the funniest thing you've ever seen, I'm just saying, how cool is it that you can brighten someone's day with a few clicks on a computer!

I would have to say my true respect for e-mail didn't start until this past year at school. UVa uses Gmail, so I got to customize my account, complete with labels and fun, tropical colors. And, even though I don't always comment on some of the arguing that goes on over listservs, I love to read through everything. So, I guess you can say Gmail and I were just really good friends.

Our real relationship began when I created the greatest listserv of all time: The Zenith Listserv (I was about to put the link, but then didn't because I don't want an influx of fan mail). After this was created, I would say that not only did Gmail and I start dating, we were basically married.

The Zenith listserv provided some many wonderful threads, about so many wonderful/strange things. It let us talk about Spread the Love- always a topic of high importance and high excitement levels, it let us plan family dinners, birthday parties, and cleaning sessions, it let us talk to each other while we were all sitting in the same library not doing any work, and, maybe most importantly, it let us practice being witty. It was so great people even tried to hack it!

I guess my love of Gmail started the summer before The Zenith, when I would send countless Youtube and Hulu videos to my fellow Orientation Leaders. I would provide notable links to these videos here, but a) I have already used them as links in other posts b) if you know me, which you should if you're reading this, you've already seen the videos against your will multiple times, so you wouldn't really want to watch anyway). The videos became the go-to one-liners for the summer, and I'll forever be so happy that some of the jokes are still used a whole year later.

Anyways, I love how e-mail can bring people together. I love listening to peoples reactions to videos I sent out via e-mail, I love sitting in the library on my e-mail for hours, not doing any homework, and laughing out loud to some of the threads, I love sending really long e-mails with lots of information, and then giving cliffnotes at the end, I love getting "good luck" e-mails from my roommates when I have a test, I love a good Legends e-mail, I love e-mailing grandma every morning, I love seeing what time people sent e-mails and not feeling so bad about myself when I realized they were up far later than me studying, and I love when people like my e-mails. It's a digital world, might as well make the most of one of the best digital services out there.

Not going to lie, there were days when I opened my e-mail, so far too many unread e-mails, and promptly closed my computer, but the ridiculousness and tears of laughter I experienced from my e-mail outweigh any of the stress I ever had.

I want to leave you with one of my favorite exchanges of all time. Last names were removed for safety, but I think you'll get the gist of it. It is important in reading this thread to keep in mind that everyone involved was sitting in the same library, in various locations, studying for finals and trying to plan a birthday dinner for Alexis from Texas. Also, please note that Quinn somehow joined in on the conversation, but we're not really sure how. QAB (Questionable at Best). Note: Some content has been edited as to make this post not go on for years/so that an innocent bystander can follow along.

Date: May 9; Location: Alderman Library; Time: 3:50-5:19pm; Weather: Mild;

Average Amount of Sleep everyone was running on due to the fact that finals were happening: Unhealthily Below Average

Subject of E-mail: Darling Dumplings Die

Em: from memory i am going to name every single place on the corner (by location) and you choose [I left this in because it is just so darn impressive]

Cohn's

Bodos

Starbucks

Take It Away is Closed

Biltmore

Old Buddhist Bike Bar and Grill - now is something new

Sushi Love

Para Coffee

Three

College Inn

Finch

Little John's

Michael's Bistro

Trinity

CVS

Qdoba

Christian's

and that bar on the corner

Basil

Lemongrass

Subway

Rev Soup

Arch's

Pita Pit

Fox Park Coffee

Mellow Mushroom

Jimmy Johns

Red Roof Inn

this is taking entirely too long to list....

somewhere yummy is always good

Kate: Those finches were looking awfully tempting today Emily....I could def go for one of those with some zesty bbq sauce......MMMMMMMMMMMMMM

- Kate "It's so cold in Alderman my typing speed is significantly slowed" J

Tex: Cohn's sounds like the best option to me. Definitely. Followed closely by CVS.

Al: for dessert we will all hit up that tanning salon. boom baby. boom boom boom.

Em: hhh man i forgot to include that nice picture frame store (that no one ever goes too) and the white spot darn it

I"M IN ALDY WITH KATE AND QUINN IN THE VERY SCHOLARLY LAB

Tex: I'm in the b&w room, or the Michael Jackson room as I like to think of it, in my head.

Maris: WE ARE ALL SO PRODUCTIVE! I JUST TOOK A NAP AND A SHOWER!

Al: even tho it's your bday tex, that was too soon.

for everyone who's in aldy meet at the front steps at 5:55 so we can walk to the corner together, while skipping and holding hands. duh

Tex: Quinn, are you coming to dinner with us?

Kate: No, he's not invited. also he is a tricky trickster.

Well actually I guess he's invited if you want him to come. It's your bday. THE BIG 2-0.

Em: TWENTY FUNNY AND THRIVING

also guys, in economics terms, dumping is "the pricing of a product below its cost of production" (wikipedia) and i was just referring to how cheep the dumplings are...duhh

QB: if i go, i would also like to celebrate mother's day

Kate: SHIT DID ALEXIS NOT SURVIVE TEEN PREGNANCY?!?!?!?!?

QB: i will confirm that they laughed out loud

Tex: Uh...guys, I can't remember if survived teen pregnancy or not. Didn't someone make a photo story of my teenage years that we can reference?

Al: there's a ginger who is sitting on the 3rd floor with me that i named evan o'murphy. (he's irish).

We then went to Pizza Rise, and had a delicious birthday dinner. I didn't make a lot of friends in the library that day, due to the fact that I was not very focused/LOL-ing like a boss. Rockstar of the Day is Gmail. Happy Thursday! P&B.

Have you seen Missy?

Part I.

Wednesday, June 30, 7:58 am: The GC is still nowhere to be found. The train is also -48 degrees, and I acquired frost bite.

Thursday, July 1 (Happy Canada Day), 7:58 am: GC = DNE.

Part II.

Please enjoy this e-mail I received on one of my favorite listservs. Make sure you read it all the way through! I cannot promise you that it is 100% true- you know I don't know (line courtesy of Ryan Bugas) but I can promise you that it is very witty, fresh, and hysterical. Rockstar of this post is Dever, who sent this e-mail to the G-unit.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.15am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Poster

Hi
I opened the screen door yesterday and my cat got out and has been missing since then so I was wondering if you are not to busy you could make a poster for me. It has to be A4 and I will photocopy it and put it around my suburb this afternoon.



This is the only photo of her I have she answers to the name Missy and is black and white and about 8 months old. missing on Harper street and my phone number.
Thanks Shan.
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.26am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
That is shocking news. Luckily I was sitting down when I read your email and not half way up a ladder or tree. How are you holding up? I am surprised you managed to attend work at all what with thinking about Missy out there cold, frightened and alone... possibly lying on the side of the road, her back legs squashed by a vehicle, calling out "Shannon, where are you?"
Although I have two clients expecting completed work this afternoon, I will, of course, drop everything and do whatever it takes to facilitate the speedy return of Missy.
Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.37am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Poster

yeah ok thanks. I know you dont like cats but I am really worried about mine. I have to leave at 1pm today.
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.17am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
I never said I don't like cats. Once, having been invited to a party, I went clothes shopping beforehand and bought a pair of expensive G-Star boots. They were two sizes too small but I wanted them so badly I figured I could just wear them without socks and cut my toenails very short. As the party was only a few blocks from my place, I decided to walk. After the first block, I lost all feeling in my feet. Arriving at the party, I stumbled into a guy named Steven, spilling Malibu & coke onto his white Wham 'Choose Life' t-shirt, and he punched me. An hour or so after the incident, Steven sat down in a chair already occupied by a cat. The surprised cat clawed and snarled causing Steven to leap out of the chair, slip on a rug and strike his forehead onto the corner of a speaker; resulting in a two inch open gash. In its shock, the cat also defecated, leaving Steven with a foul stain down the back of his beige cargo pants. I liked that cat.
Attached poster as requested.
Regards, David.



From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.24am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah thats not what I was looking for at all. it looks like a movie and how come the photo of Missy is so small?
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.28am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
It's a design thing. The cat is lost in the negative space.
Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.33am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Thats just stupid. Can you do it properly please? I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears. you seem to think it is funny. Can you make the photo bigger please and fix the text and do it in colour please. Thanks.
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.46am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism. I don't come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I am willing to overlook this faux pas due to you no doubt being preoccupied with thoughts of Missy attempting to make her way home across busy intersections or being trapped in a drain as it slowly fills with water. I spent three days down a well once but that was just for fun.
I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions.
Regards, David.


From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.59am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

This is worse than the other one. can you make it so it shows the whole photo of Missy and delete the stupid text that says missing missy off it? I just want it to say Lost.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.14am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster


From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.21am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah can you do the poster or not? I just want a photo and the word lost and the telephone number and when and where she was lost and her name. Not like a movie poster or anything stupid. I have to leave early today. If it was your cat I would help you. Thanks.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.32am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Awww

Dear Shannon,
I don't have a cat. I once agreed to look after a friend's cat for a week but after he dropped it off at my apartment and explained the concept of kitty litter, I kept the cat in a closed cardboard box in the shed and forgot about it. If I wanted to feed something and clean faeces, I wouldn't have put my mother in that home after her stroke. A week later, when my friend came to collect his cat, I pretended that I was not home and mailed the box to him. Apparently I failed to put enough stamps on the package and he had to collect it from the post office and pay eighteen dollars. He still goes on about that sometimes, people need to learn to let go.
I have attached the amended version of your poster as per your detailed instructions.
Regards, David.


From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.47am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Awww

Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange. I gave you a photo of my cat.
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.58am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Awww

I know, but that one is cute. As Missy has quite possibly met any one of several violent ends, it is possible you might get a better cat out of this. If anybody calls and says "I haven't seen your orange cat but I did find a black and white one with its hind legs run over by a car, do you want it?" you can politely decline and save yourself a costly veterinarian bill.
I knew someone who had a basset hound that had its hind legs removed after an accident and it had to walk around with one of those little buggies with wheels. If it had been my dog I would have asked for all its legs to be removed and replaced with wheels and had a remote control installed. I could charge neighbourhood kids for rides and enter it in races. If I did the same with a horse I could drive it to work. I would call it Steven.
Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.07pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Please just use the photo I gave you.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.22pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww


From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.34pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

I didnt say there was a reward. I dont have $2000 dollars. What did you even put that there for? Apart from that it is perfect can you please remove the reward bit. Thanks Shan.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.42pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww


From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Can you just please take the reward bit off altogether? I have to leave in ten minutes and I still have to make photocopies of it.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.56pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww


From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 1.03pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Fine. That will have to do.